Swearingen and Loposser are two somewhat common Tennessee surnames. There are Swearingens buried in rural West Tennessee, in the same cemeteries where many of my direct ancestors are buried. One can find centuries old Swearingen headstones all over Tennessee. I never heard of either surname until meeting Victoria, and was enchanted by the phonetics of both surnames.

Victoria Swearingen married Dustin Loposser to become Victoria Loposser. She was hired at Mouse's Ear roughly four years prior to my 2019 arrival. She danced in Tampa in between that time. Living in Florida, she was happier to be closer to one of her favorite places on Earth, Disney World. She already had one baby with Mr. Loposser when we were coworkers in Knoxville. The Lopossers had recently moved back to Knoxville from Florida when I was hired. Recent voter registration has Mr. and Mrs. Loposser listed as a Democrats in North Carolina. They've since had a second baby. Mr. Loposser owned businesses such as toy stores. Mrs. Loposser openly discussed in the workplace how she expects her husband to provide her with lots of money for things such as Victoria's Secret lingerie, Disney World trips, and Disney merchandise. She gave him these Disney budget specifications prior to marriage. Mr. Loposser is a very large man who is balding. Mrs. Loposser is quite slender and stereotypically beautiful, but she is very open about being a chubby chaser with a sexual preference for big fat guys. Good for her. Good for them both, truly. Mr. Loposser has an older son who is autistic, from a previous relationship. Mr. Loposser is a few years older than me, while Mrs. Loposser is ten years younger than me. From what I gather, Mrs. Loposser does not use drugs and is a very attentive mommy.

Victoria has long limbs, shapely hips, small chest, dark hair, olive skin, classical Tennessee face previously discussed on this series, and sparkling sapphire eyes. Her teeth aren't perfect, but who cares when you're as aesthetically gifted as she. Photos do not do justice to how uniquely lovely Mrs. Loposser looks in person. Her otherworldly beauty cannot be captured, only seen in person. While Alex Cave's online photos conceal her hideousness through the use of filters and misleading angles, Victoria Loposser's online photos do the opposite, in that they would never be able to display her in-person sparkle.

Victoria introduced herself to me as Zoey, her stage name. In the beginning, she approached me and informed me that she knew I was being bullied by a voluminous amount of our coworkers. She stated that it was because I was making so much money. She stated that she had very similar problems when she started working at Mouse's Ear four years ago, prior to moving to Florida, and occasionally still did have those problems. She stated that I wasn't doing anything wrong or out of line in terms of hustling etiquette, it was just that Mouse's Ear is a particularly difficult place in terms of how the dancers treated one another. Zoey extended an olive branch to me socially, sat with me, protected me, and attempted to chat with me over the course of the next couple of weeks. I was so thankful for all of that, but unfortunately I did not provide Zoey with sufficient amounts of social reciprocation that she expected. I blew it! I tried; I tried.

Sometimes I quietly sit while not speaking, if there is nothing interesting to talk about and I am among people who are not stimulating. Sometimes I get up and walk away from people who are sitting with me, because their general presence gives me anxiety and drains me of energy. I have been accused of being “on the spectrum” by various people in my life, but I do not appreciate the labels. With Zoey's neurodivergent step son, I would think she'd have more of an understanding and not hate me for not providing her with sufficient social companionship. I struggled to find things to talk about with Zoey during the times that she went out of her way to sit with me. I wanted to be entertaining for Zoey, because I was gracious about her willingness to be my ally, her willingness to acknowledge that I did not deserve to be bullied for selling lots of songs. She only discussed boring subjects though, such as Disney World and stripper clothes, rather than subjects such as science, global politics, economics, or liberation of any flavor. I like Disney World too, but she did not want to analyze the architecture, the anti-feminist princess culture, the global politics of World Showcase, or the conspiracy theories of the park when I brought those subjects up. I didn't mean Zoey any harm, I just found her to be very boring, and didn't know what to do about it besides space out or awkwardly walk away, saying things like, “Oh, I'm going to go talk to that customer over there!” When customers come in, a switch flips in my brain and I become a focused salesperson. I obsessively glance over at the door, waiting for them to come in, and then I take care of business as quickly as possible. I greatly appreciated the fact that Zoey was protecting me from the wrath of our coworkers in the beginning, but I really preferred to sit by myself when not hustling. I like to daydream and to have my mind wander, to reminisce, to strategize about my various projects outside of work, to re-charge from sensory overload, to analyze the musical notes and lyrics in a methodical way inside my own head. Talking to Zoey just made me want to cry! Oh my god it was horrible! She was so nice, yet so vapid. I thanked her many times, but it wasn't enough!

Another reason I avoided Zoey is because she hung out with Selexa so often. I thought it was strange that Zoey would be sitting there explaining to me how I didn't deserve to be harassed by the other dancers for making money, and then an hour later, she would be hanging out with Selexa, enabling her to do horrible things, being complicit by proxy. Zoey and Selexa were coworkers for years and occasionally socialized outside of work. I cannot cluster together with, and be complicit with, the likes of Leah Ewing.

I hope I have sufficiently explained why I struggled to comfortably sit with and “hang out” with Zoey in the workplace. I never hated her or had malicious intent in avoiding her. Unfortunately for me, Zoey was sensitive and reactionary to how I am. Because I did not provide her with satisfying social company when she sat with me, she eventually stopped sitting with me. She didn't leave peacefully though. She retaliated. She said that she “fucking hates” me in the dressing room when she didn't think I'd hear her. She began interrupting my one-on-one conversations with customers. Her hustle-trolling didn't effect my income much, because we had really different customer bases. If there was an open chair where I wanted to sit, she would extend her leg up on the chair so I had nowhere to go, then give me a sinister expression. Zoey didn't like when I was laying down on a bench upstairs in the dressing room, and verbally expressed her disdain. When my car was in the shop because it has almost 300,000 miles on it, while I was openly discussing it with coworkers, Zoey started loudly bragging about how her big fat businessman husband bought her a brand new car, then sneered at me.

Zoey had a secret dismay for some of Conner’s behavior. I caught her and some of the other dancers talking about him one day when I quietly went up the stairs. I suspect Conner was secretly mean to a lot more dancers than I know about, all with the guise of being a nice guy “feminist.” Zoey didn't want me to hear her complaining about Conner, and her code word for when I was around was “Ears,” because she knew I listened to things. It's unfortunate so many people were secretive about his abuse, rather than bombastically complaining about him, secretly audio recording him, and/or filing lawsuits against the Brownings for allowing him to be that way.

Zoey and Alex Cave were on great terms. Eventually Zoey learnt that I was actively resisting Alex's extortion called “tips.” Zoey began occasionally freaking out in the dressing room about the matter. It is unfortunate that Scab Alex Cave was unwilling to demand a living wage from the Brownings, but always made sure to get as many dancers against me as she possibly could. Zoey never expressed interest in dancer rights, and even if she heard about my litigious history, I doubt she'd think about it too deeply. It is very depressing that Zoey thought Alex Cave was entitled to a single cent of my money, and then decided to bother me about it.

When Heidi started working at Mouse's Ear, she noticed how pretty Zoey is, excitedly commented about it, and pursued a friendship with her. Heidi isn't a lesbian; she had a sexual fetish for black men and a black boyfriend at the time. I think Heidi was just interested in pursuing Zoey because they are both these ultrafeminine, normal people who liked “being girls” together. That's not really something I can relate to. Heidi was able to surpass a lot of the high sales newcomer stigma by befriending Zoey, and because she is very gregarious. Zoey reciprocated Heidi's pursuits, by becoming her bestie right away, like platonic life partner love at first sight. It was kind of weird how quickly those two committed to each other as besties. That tends to happen in strip clubs though, and then the besties will break up after like a year or two. After Zoey and Heidi became besties, Zoey actively prevented Heidi from talking to me, as though we were twelve year olds. Zoey would do things like physically put her body in between Heidi and I if we were speaking, so I couldn't see Heidi's face, and then glare at me, like a jealous girlfriend. Very gay. It was both comedic and insane, but Zoey was very serious about it, while ditsy drunk Heidi didn't openly react to it. I suspect Heidi had hidden thoughts about it, but she never let me know about them because she was such a polite coworker. Zoey did not want me to express concern about Heidi's drunk driving, and would get pissed off if I did so. Zoey and Heidi went on vacations together with Zoey's son and step son. Zoey and Heidi went to get their clitoral hoods pierced together, which creeped me the fuck out when they were showing them off in the dressing room. Zoey very much bonded with other “girl's girls” in the dressing room, who were also interested in concrete things that I can't really relate to and don't care to bond over. Often times, women enjoy each other in a platonic intimate way that I could care less about participating in.

Victoria Loposser's facebook used to contain lots of photos of her husband as well as Heidi, but now all of those are gone. At work, she discussed her difficult marriage and the passion that was gone from her relationship. I'm not sure if she has moved on from both her husband and Heidi, but she still works at Mouse's Ear from time to time.

I once read a prison survival guide written by a political prisoner, who emphasized how necessary it is to spend at least fifteen minutes per day in the entertainment room, socializing with the other inmates, no matter how unsavory they are to be around. He explained that if someone does not do that in prison, then one will be shunned and treated poorly by the other inmates who are tribal. Strip clubs and other workplaces are similar. At Mouse's Ear, I just didn't do that enough. There were other dancers who didn't take razor blades to their genitals, but I was the only one to be called “Chewbacca bitch” about it. There were other dancers who sold many songs, but not everyone was called “cut throat” about it. Young Lilith understood this dynamic very well, and explained it to me in a way that I have already described-- that I was so vulnerable because I preferred to be alone most of the time when not hustling. It is unfortunate that I wasn't just allowed to sit, meditate, sell dances, and not be bothered by anybody. I could've avoided a lot of the unpleasantness by entertaining more concrete conversation with Zoey, thus insulating myself. Instead, my mind wandered, the thin-skinned fuckin bitch turned on me, and I became even more marginalized than before. I sure hope Victoria Swearingen Loposser is more accepting of her step son than she is to socially awkward coworkers. I didn’t deserve any of that shit.

If any of my readers know the status of her marriage, please contact me. One of the last times I saw Heidi, I was driving to Waffle House after work. Her SUV was ahead of me, swerving in the lanes.